


First Blood

by Rainbow_Foxes



Series: FemJay Weekend 2020 [1]
Category: Batman (Comics), Batman - All Media Types
Genre: Attempted Rape/Non-Con, Blood and Gore, Female Jason Todd, Gen, Implied/Referenced Drug Addiction, Implied/Referenced Rape/Non-con, Jason Todd Needs A Hug, Protective Jason Todd, Willis Todd is an Okay Dad, gratuitous symbolism
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-11
Updated: 2020-09-11
Packaged: 2021-03-06 17:02:05
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,215
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26412319
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Rainbow_Foxes/pseuds/Rainbow_Foxes
Summary: written for the Fem Jay Week 2020 Day 1 prompt: First Time.Faye Todd had blood on her hands years before she decided to steal some tires.
Relationships: Catherine Todd & Jason Todd, Catherine Todd/Willis Todd, Jason Todd & Willis Todd
Series: FemJay Weekend 2020 [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1919755
Comments: 14
Kudos: 100
Collections: FemJay Week 2020





	First Blood

**Author's Note:**

> As stated, this is written for the [Fem Jay Week](https://femjaytodd.tumblr.com/) event over on Tumblr. Check it out and maybe fill some of the prompts!
> 
> A note on naming: In Red Hood and the Outlaws (2016) #23, It's stated that Jason is named after his grandfather. in #25, it's revealed that Faye "Ma" Gunn is Jason's grandmother. It stands to reason that if Jason had been born AFAB, she'd have been named Faye after her grandmother.

Her first kill is years before she meets Bruce.

She’s seven years old — her birthday was last week. Momma had made brownies from the box instead of a cake since the icing was too expensive, but Faye likes brownies better anyways. Daddy came home with chili dogs from her favorite cart, still warm and covered in gooey cheese. They sang ‘Happy Birthday’ to her after dinner, Daddy’s deep rumbling voice overtaking Momma’s softer bird-like tones in places. Then she blew out the little candle on her brownie, and Momma brought out her gift: a simple Barbie playset wrapped in the prettiest yellow wrapping paper Faye had ever seen and topped with a big green bow.

She sits in the living room now, playing with that Barbie. She — the doll — is much paler than Faye and has big brown eyes like Momma’s instead of Faye’s blue-green, but her long red hair is nearly the same shade as Faye’s and they have the same freckles on their cheeks. Her outfit is kinda dumb — the baby pink shirt paired with super blue shorts making her look like a cartoon character — but Faye loves her shiny red boots and the chicken coop she came with and the little chickens and the even littler bright yellow chicks.

Momma had been playing with her earlier, having the chickens climb up their dog Sparky’s back for Faye and her doll to rescue, and helping her make new clothes for the doll from paper and scrap fabric. But Momma got tired like she does a lot recently, and had to lay down on the couch. Sparky curled up with her, and Momma put on one of those talk shows with the yelling people that no one actually watches.

Faye talks quietly to herself, playing out an adventure involving saving one of the little chicks from her stuffed cat, Kitty. The doll's feet crinkle the wrapping paper as Faye bounces her across. 

She had kept the paper rather than rip it to shreds like the kids on TV do. It was too pretty to throw out — a pale yellow with shimmery, swirly birds all over it that changed from barely-there gold to bright silver when she tilted it the right way. Parts of it had torn when she was peeling the tape off, but it was still good. Momma had even saved the bow and used a ribbon off of one of her dresses to make it into a hair band for Faye, which she now wore to keep her bangs out of her face.

Sparky picks his head up from Momma’s side and looks at the door seconds before there are three loud knocks. Faye jumps at the sound and turns to her Momma, who looks just as startled and confused as she is. Momma turns the TV off, and slowly moves to stand when whoever it is knocks again, somehow louder.

“Cathy you bitch! Open up, I know you’re in there!” It’s a man’s voice, loud and angry. 

Sparky growls and Momma is moving much faster now. She grabs Faye by the arm and pulls her into the kitchen. Momma opens up the cabinet under the sink and pushes her inside.

“Momma?” Her voice is shaking and so is she. She can feel tears building in her eyes.

“Shhhh. You must be very, _very_ quiet Blue Jay, do you understand? We’re playing a game — You’re going to hide and not come out until Momma or Daddy come to get you, okay? No matter what you hear, you don’t come out? Can you do that for me?” 

Momma is using her Serious Voice, the one she only uses when telling Faye to not open the door by herself or to not talk to Mr. O’Malley down the street. So Faye nods like she does whenever Momma uses her Serious Voice, and Momma presses a kiss to her forehead like she does whenever she uses her Serious Voice, and Momma closes the cabinet door.

Faye hears more banging, but the voice is muffled now. She hears Momma open the door, and now the yelling is loud again. Sparky is barking, and Momma is yelling too. Faye puts her hands over her ears to try to block it out, but she can still hear everything.

“Where’s my money, Cathy?”

“I told you, I need more time. I can’t work anymore, and Wil-” There’s the sound of a smack and then a thump, and then Sparky growling, and then the man screaming.

“Fuck! Stupid fucking dog!” There’s another thump, a big one that shakes the walls, quickly followed by a whine. “And where do you think you’re going, bitch?” 

“Please Earl, I’m sorry! I’ll get you your money, I promise! I just need a few more days!” Momma gasps, and she sounds hurt.

The man, Earl, is mean when he responds. “Nu-uh, too late for that. You’re gonna pay me back now, one way or another.” There’s heavy footsteps and the sound of something — someone? — being dragged across the carpet, and Momma is _screaming._

“Please! Please, I’ll pay! I’ll pay!” And then the sound of a door slamming. 

She can still hear sounds, but they’re muffled again. Faye chokes on her sobs, trying to keep quiet like Momma said. Everything is too quiet now, only faint sounds from what she thinks is Momma and Daddy’s bedroom making it to her. Momma is hurt, is _still being_ hurt, she knows it, but she can’t make herself move. She is frozen, curled around herself in the dark stuffy cabinet. Faye wishes she could save her like she saves the chickens from Kitty, but she can’t. She’s too little.

_Robin is little too._

The thought comes to her on its own. Robin _is_ small, even though Faye thinks he’s a lot older than her — at least four whole years — and he fights lots of big scary people all the time! She can’t do all the fancy flips he does, but Daddy taught her how to punch right and she made Josh Winters cry, she kicked him so hard on the playground. Faye wipes her eyes and nose on her sleeves. She’s gonna be like Robin. She’s gonna save Momma.

She opens the cabinet door quietly, peering through the crack as it grows. Everything is quiet, aside from the sounds coming from Momma and Daddy’s bedroom. Faye can see Sparky slumped against the wall on the far side of the apartment, quiet but still breathing. She creeps out slowly, aware of every sound she makes — the soft creak of the cabinet door, the barely there sound of her breath, and the soft slap of her bare feet on the kitchen tile. She crawls across the floor, too scared to stand just yet. 

When she gets into the living room, she pauses, eyeing the phone on the side table. She could call the police, that’s what she _should_ do, according to her teachers at school. But everyone knows that the police don’t come to the Narrows, and when they do it can take hours. Momma doesn’t have that kind of time. 

Her eyes drift to the front door, still left wide open. She could run and get help, but no one had come when Momma was screaming and Sparky was barking. Why would they come for her?

Then her eyes drift off to the side, where her toys are. There’s red stuff — blood, she realizes — on her new doll. Her pink shirt is staining brown from it and it’s making her red hair dull and matted. It’s on the wrapping paper too, turning the cheerful yellow dark and muddy and hiding all the sparkling birds.

But that’s not what she focuses on. Her eyes are glued to the new thing among them. It’s a gun, she knows, because Daddy told her all about them. He showed her the one he keeps in his nightstand and explained to her all the parts. He told her what they’re used for and that she should never, _ever_ touch one.

She picks it up despite that, surprised by how heavy it is. She needs both hands to hold it, and it makes her wrists hurt from the strain of it. It’s cold to the touch and smells smoky in a way that makes her nose itch.

Daddy will be mad, she thinks, and she’ll probably get a spanking for it, but she doesn’t put the gun down. Instead, she flips the little switch that he called ‘the safety’ and turns towards the bedroom door. She gets to her feet slowly, careful to keep her fingers off the trigger like Daddy told her. Faye walks with tentative baby steps to the door, and stops in front of it. Her hands are shaking, but she can’t tell if it's from the strain of holding the gun or fear.

The sounds are louder now, but still hard to hear. She can tell that Momma is crying, though. That’s enough to have Faye squaring her shoulders.

_Brave like Robin._

Faye opens the door slowly, holding her breath and praying to Mary and Jesus and God Himself for her Momma’s safety and her own. The room is dim, lit only by the setting sunlight coming in through the window. The man is on top of Momma in the bed, and Momma is crying and pushing at him, clawing at whatever skin she can get to with her short nails.

Faye raises the gun and takes a deep breath. Momma sees her over the man’s shoulder, and her eyes widen. She stops moving, she’s not even breathing. Momma’s afraid, but it’s okay because Faye is going to save her. The man notices, and turns to see what caught Momma’s attention.

“What are you looking at, who—” He doesn’t get to finish. Faye fires off one shot that hits him in the shoulder, and then another that gets him in the neck. He goes down gurgling, clutching his neck as bright red blood spurts from between his fingers.

Momma screams as the blood covers her face and hands. She pushes the man off of her and to the floor. They both watch, still as stone, unable to even blink, as the man dies.

Faye is shaking again.

Momma finally gets off the bed and walks over to her, slow and cautious like when she tries to feed the stray dogs in the neighborhood. She kneels before Faye just as slowly, and carefully wraps her hands around the gun.

“Faye? Honey? I need you to give me the gun, okay? The bad man isn’t going to hurt me anymore, but I need you to let go of the gun Blue Jay.” Faye’s ears are ringing, so it’s hard to hear what Momma says, but she gets the gist of it from how her hands tug on the gun. Faye lets her take it.

Momma flips the little switch before setting it down. Then she pulls Faye into a tight hug, one hand on her head and the other rubbing circles on her back.

“It’s okay, it’s okay. My brave little Blue Jay, you did good baby. You did a good thing. You cry it all out, okay? Cry as much as you need.” Faye hadn’t realized she was crying, but now she can feel the tears on her cheeks. She starts sobbing in earnest, her whole body shaking with her cries.

She looks at her hands clenched in the back of Mamma’s shirt. They’re covered in blood.

She hears footsteps, and Daddy calling for her and Momma. It isn’t long before he’s in the room with them.

“Oh Jesus Christ,” Daddy swears. He kneels besides them, taking Momma’s face into his hand, rubbing some of the blood away with his thumb. His other hand is on Faye’s shoulder, and she shakes less under the familiar weight. “Are you hurt? What happened?” He asks. He sounds scared, and Faye has never heard her Daddy scared before.

“We’re okay, I’m okay. It’s not our blood.” Momma starts. She swallows before she continues “ Earl came by today, asking for money. I told him I didn’t have it, and, well, he didn’t like that. Sparky bit him, and Earl dragged me in here. He was going to—he tried to—” Momma starts crying again “Faye stopped him. She _killed_ him.” Momma starts breathing fast “What are we going to do Willis? She’s just a little girl, she can’t—”

Daddy presses a kiss to Momma’s forehead, rubbing at her cheek again. “It’s okay Cathy, I’ll take care of it. Nothing’s gonna happen to Faye, I promise.” When Daddy uses that tone, he always means what he says.

Daddy turns to Faye now, and gives her a forehead kiss too. Then he looks her right in the eyes — and they have the same eyes, that’s what Faye’s been told. She wonders if she looks as scary as Daddy does when she’s being serious — and says “You did good, Blue Jay, and I’m proud of you. But you can’t _ever_ tell anyone about this, Understand?”

She nods “Yes Daddy.” Daddy presses another kiss to her forehead, and starts talking to Momma. Faye can’t focus on what they’re saying anymore. Something else has her attention.

Now Daddy’s hands are red, too.

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you so much for reading! Please comment down below about what you thought. Constructive criticism is always welcome as long as we keep it polite.
> 
> You can also find me on [My Tumblr](https://rainbowfoxes.tumblr.com/) if you so please. Come chat with me about Fem Jay, or anything at all, really.


End file.
